I received an email today, just your regular, ordinary, generic email from an older relative. It sort of hit me where I live these days. Usually I blow this sort of email off in a hurry but this one really made me think. It said that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime and when you know which category they fit into, you will know what to do for that person. An interesting thought and, looking back, I can sort of see where some of the people in my past have fit in. I used to move all over the place when I was little and as a result, I make friends really fast in most situations. When I was younger, knowing that the next move was coming up, I usually broke off my friendships. It didn't do me any good to have a friend a thousand miles away, back in the days of high cost for long distance phone calls and also, I knew I would never go back to see them. As a child, I didn't have any way to get back to the last place. Once I got grown, I seemed to keep to that pattern.
So, now that I am middle aged, how can the philosophy of that email relate to me? Well, I don't move around like I used to but I have moved some. I have accumulated friends here and there. Some I recognize as lifelong friends, some I know immediately that they will not be there as the years roll on. Then there are the few who I thought would be one of the life long ones who for some reason slip away. Those are the ones who stick out in my mind the most but I have learned that they were there when I needed them or when they needed me, and now it is time for them to fall away.
Either this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an
end or I will. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. Sometimes they feel like I have acted up and they must take a stand.
What I must realize is that my need has been met and I need to move on and find some way to reconcile myself to the happy memories, the good times and hope that my friend does not go bitterly or with bad thoughts, either.
I have no fear that I will not make more friends and I have so many wonderful memories of the good times I have had with all of my current friends and ones that have faded away. I think it is true that most people have never had half as many friends as I have had over the years and few have as many "keepers" as I.
To the ones who went away, "Goodbye, Friend, think of me now and again and hopefully the good times we had will overshadow the one parting scene we had." I'm here, I'll be here or somewhere easy to find me, no worries but I won't be expecting your call.